Quotes of the Day

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Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Updated: 2 hours 8 min ago

Johnny Carson

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 7:00pm
"If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Edmond de Goncourt

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 7:00pm
"A painting in a museum hears more ridiculous opinions than anything else in the world."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Eric Hoffer

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 7:00pm
"It is a sign of a creeping inner death when we no longer can praise the living."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Edward P. Tryon

Wed, 10/22/2014 - 7:00pm
"In answer to the question of why it happened, I offer the modest proposal that our Universe is simply one of those things which happen from time to time."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Terry Pratchett

Tue, 10/21/2014 - 7:00pm
"I'll be more enthusiastic about encouraging thinking outside the box when there's evidence of any thinking going on inside it."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Herb Caen

Tue, 10/21/2014 - 7:00pm
"The only thing wrong with immortality is that it tends to go on forever."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Andy Gibb

Tue, 10/21/2014 - 7:00pm
"Girls are always running through my mind. They don't dare walk."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Mark Twain

Tue, 10/21/2014 - 7:00pm
"In Paris they simply stared when I spoke to them in French; I never did succeed in making those idiots understand their language."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Jules Renard

Mon, 10/20/2014 - 7:00pm
"Literature is an occupation in which you have to keep proving your talent to people who have none."
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J. Robert Oppenheimer

Mon, 10/20/2014 - 7:00pm
"Any man whose errors take ten years to correct is quite a man."
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Lenin

Mon, 10/20/2014 - 7:00pm
"A lie told often enough becomes the truth."
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Friedrich Nietzsche

Mon, 10/20/2014 - 7:00pm
"Only sick music makes money today."
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John Blake

Sun, 10/19/2014 - 7:00pm
"The world tolerates conceit from those who are successful, but not from anybody else."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Alfred Hitchcock

Sun, 10/19/2014 - 7:00pm
"Television has done much for psychiatry by spreading information about it, as well as contributing to the need for it."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Joey Adams

Sun, 10/19/2014 - 7:00pm
"A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Will Rogers

Sun, 10/19/2014 - 7:00pm
"The more you read and observe about this Politics thing, you got to admit that each party is worse than the other. The one that's out always looks the best."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Sophocles

Sat, 10/18/2014 - 7:00pm
"The keenest sorrow is to recognize ourselves as the sole cause of all our adversities."
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H. L. Mencken

Sat, 10/18/2014 - 7:00pm
"In the United States, doing good has come to be, like patriotism, a favorite device of persons with something to sell."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Thomas H. Huxley

Sat, 10/18/2014 - 7:00pm
"Try to learn something about everything and everything about something."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Tellis Frank

Sat, 10/18/2014 - 7:00pm
"The worst thing about Europe is that you can't go out in the middle of the night and get a Slurpee."
Categories: Fun Stuff