Quotes of the Day

Syndicate content Quotes of the Day
Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Updated: 3 hours 52 min ago

Chuck Lorre, Steven Molaro and Eric Kaplan

Wed, 12/17/2014 - 6:00pm
"Ah! Memory impairment: the free prize at the bottom of every vodka bottle!"
Categories: Fun Stuff

C. S. Lewis

Wed, 12/17/2014 - 6:00pm
"The trouble about trying to make yourself stupider than you really are is that you very often succeed."
Categories: Fun Stuff

John Stuart Mill

Wed, 12/17/2014 - 6:00pm
"If mankind minus one were of one opinion, then mankind is no more justified in silencing the one than the one - if he had the power - would be justified in silencing mankind."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Henry J. Tillman

Wed, 12/17/2014 - 6:00pm
"Life is something that everyone should try at least once."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Elbert Hubbard

Tue, 12/16/2014 - 6:00pm
"Every man is a damn fool for at least five minutes every day; wisdom consists of not exceeding the limit."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Jimmy Buffett

Tue, 12/16/2014 - 6:00pm
"Indecision may or may not be my problem."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Marlon Brando

Tue, 12/16/2014 - 6:00pm
"If there's anything unsettling to the stomach, it's watching actors on television talk about their personal lives."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Mel Brooks

Tue, 12/16/2014 - 6:00pm
"If God wanted us to fly, He would have given us tickets."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Ellen DeGeneres

Mon, 12/15/2014 - 6:00pm
"In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. There was still nothing, but you could see it a whole lot better."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Flannery O'Connor

Mon, 12/15/2014 - 6:00pm
"The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Vince Lombardi

Mon, 12/15/2014 - 6:00pm
"If you aren't fired with enthusiasm, you will be fired with enthusiasm."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Don Marquis

Mon, 12/15/2014 - 6:00pm
"When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: 'Whose?'"
Categories: Fun Stuff

Kurt Vonnegut

Sun, 12/14/2014 - 6:00pm
"Another flaw in the human character is that everybody wants to build and nobody wants to do maintenance."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Peter Borden

Sun, 12/14/2014 - 6:00pm
"Most advances in science come when a person for one reason or another is forced to change fields."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Sir Winston Churchill

Sun, 12/14/2014 - 6:00pm
"When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my own country. I make up for lost time when I come home."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Charles Caleb Colton

Sun, 12/14/2014 - 6:00pm
"Examinations are formidable even to the best prepared, for the greatest fool may ask more than the wisest man can answer."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Brooks Atkinson

Sat, 12/13/2014 - 6:00pm
"The perfect bureaucrat everywhere is the man who manages to make no decisions and escape all responsibility."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Bertrand Russell

Sat, 12/13/2014 - 6:00pm
"The greatest challenge to any thinker is stating the problem in a way that will allow a solution."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Arthur Brisbane

Sat, 12/13/2014 - 6:00pm
"A good friend can tell you what is the matter with you in a minute. He may not seem such a good friend after telling."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Sir Thomas Beecham

Sat, 12/13/2014 - 6:00pm
"Brass bands are all very well in their place - outdoors and several miles away."
Categories: Fun Stuff