Quotes of the Day
Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Updated: 14 hours 10 min ago
"Some for renown, on scraps of learning dote, /And think they grow immortal as they quote."
"CNN is one of the participants in the war. I have a fantasy where Ted Turner is elected president but refuses because he doesn't want to give up power."
"My mother used to say that there are no strangers, only friends you haven't met yet. She's now in a maximum security twilight home in Australia."
"It is easier to fight for one's principles than to live up to them."
"That's the trouble with a politician's life-somebody is always interrupting it with an election."
"Do not worry about your difficulties in Mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater."
"Whenever I hear anyone arguing for slavery, I feel a strong impulse to see it tried on him personally."
"Everyone is born with genius, but most people only keep it a few minutes."
"There are a terrible lot of lies going around the world, and the worst of it is half of them are true."
"Physicists like to think that all you have to do is say, these are the conditions, now what happens next?"
"Finance is the art of passing money from hand to hand until it finally disappears."
"The only road to good shows is bad ones. Just go start having a bad time, and if you don't give up, you will get better."
"Patience has its limits. Take it too far, and it's cowardice."
"Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, "Where have I gone wrong?"/ Then a voice says to me, "This is going to take more than one night.""
"I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to."
"Of all forms of caution, caution in love is perhaps the most fatal to true happiness."
"Usually, terrible things that are done with the excuse that progress requires them are not really progress at all, but just terrible things."
"Life... is like a grapefruit. It's orange and squishy, and has a few pips in it, and some folks have half a one for breakfast."