Quotes of the Day

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Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Updated: 5 hours 55 min ago

Elizabeth Aston

Fri, 05/27/2016 - 7:00pm
"Love has no place in a lawyer's office."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Douglas Adams

Fri, 05/27/2016 - 7:00pm
"He attacked everything in life with a mix of extraordinary genius and naive incompetence, and it was often difficult to tell which was which."
Categories: Fun Stuff

H. L. Mencken

Fri, 05/27/2016 - 7:00pm
"I believe that all government is evil, and that trying to improve it is largely a waste of time."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Lily Tomlin

Fri, 05/27/2016 - 7:00pm
"Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Helen Rowland

Thu, 05/26/2016 - 7:00pm
"The follies which a man regrets most, in his life, are those which he didn't commit when he had the opportunity."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Jane Caminos

Thu, 05/26/2016 - 7:00pm
"A waist is a terrible thing to mind."
Categories: Fun Stuff

John Ciardi

Thu, 05/26/2016 - 7:00pm
"You don't have to suffer to be a poet; adolescence is enough suffering for anyone."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Miss Piggy

Thu, 05/26/2016 - 7:00pm
"Never eat more than you can lift."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Bernard M. Baruch

Wed, 05/25/2016 - 7:00pm
"Never answer a critic, unless he's right."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Oscar Wilde

Wed, 05/25/2016 - 7:00pm
"I like persons better than principles, and I like persons with no principles better than anything else in the world."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Johann von Neumann

Wed, 05/25/2016 - 7:00pm
"In mathematics you don't understand things. You just get used to them."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Blore's Razor

Wed, 05/25/2016 - 7:00pm
"Given a choice between two theories, take the one which is funnier."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Penn Jillette

Tue, 05/24/2016 - 7:00pm
"Technology adds nothing to art. Two thousand years ago, I could tell you a story, and at any point during the story I could stop, and ask, Now do you want the hero to be kidnapped, or not? But that would, of course, have ruined the story. Part of the experience of being entertained is sitting back and plugging into someone else's vision."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Tue, 05/24/2016 - 7:00pm
"Whoso would be a man must be a nonconformist."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Charles M. Schulz

Tue, 05/24/2016 - 7:00pm
"That's the secret to life... replace one worry with another...."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Alfred Hitchcock

Tue, 05/24/2016 - 7:00pm
"Television has done much for psychiatry by spreading information about it, as well as contributing to the need for it."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Robert Pirsig

Mon, 05/23/2016 - 7:00pm
"There is an evil tendency underlying all our technology - the tendency to do what is reasonable even when it isn't any good."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Edward Abbey

Mon, 05/23/2016 - 7:00pm
"Anarchism is founded on the observation that since few men are wise enough to rule themselves, even fewer are wise enough to rule others."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Unknown

Mon, 05/23/2016 - 7:00pm
"All general statements are false."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Shirley Temple

Mon, 05/23/2016 - 7:00pm
"I stopped believing in Santa Claus when my mother took me to see him in a department store, and he asked for my autograph."
Categories: Fun Stuff