Quotes of the Day
Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Updated: 6 hours 25 min ago
"An economist is a surgeon with an excellent scalpel and a rough-edged lancet, who operates beautifully on the dead and tortures the living."
"Have the courage to be ignorant of a great number of things, in order to avoid the calamity of being ignorant of everything."
"If I could drop dead right now, I'd be the happiest man alive."
"Blessed is the man who, having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact."
"You see, wire telegraph is a kind of a very, very long cat. You pull his tail in New York and his head is meowing in Los Angeles. Do you understand this? And radio operates exactly the same way: you send signals here, they receive them there. The only difference is that there is no cat."
"Lawyers spend a great deal of their time shoveling smoke."
"From now on, ending a sentence with a preposition is something up with which I will not put."
"Part of the inhumanity of the computer is that, once it is competently programmed and working smoothly, it is completely honest."
"The avoidance of taxes is the only intellectual pursuit that carries any reward."
"Procrastination isn't the problem, it's the solution. So procrastinate now, don't put it off."
"No matter how rich you become, how famous or powerful, when you die the size of your funeral will still pretty much depend on the weather."
"For every action there is an equal and opposite government program."
"Today's scientists have substituted mathematics for experiments, and they wander off through equation after equation, and eventually build a structure which has no relation to reality."
"It is the wretchedness of being rich that you have to live with rich people."
"Charm is a way of getting the answer yes without asking a clear question."