Quotes of the Day

Syndicate content Quotes of the Day
Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Updated: 13 min 15 sec ago

George Burns

Sun, 04/13/2014 - 7:00pm
"If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Robert Half

Sun, 04/13/2014 - 7:00pm
"Free advice is worth the price."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Phyllis Diller

Sun, 04/13/2014 - 7:00pm
"Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Leonard Bernstein

Sun, 04/13/2014 - 7:00pm
"Inspiration is wonderful when it happens, but the writer must develop an approach for the rest of the time... The wait is simply too long."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Seth MacFarlane

Sat, 04/12/2014 - 7:00pm
"The two symbols of the Republican Party: an elephant, and a big fat white guy who is threatened by change."
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Indira Gandhi

Sat, 04/12/2014 - 7:00pm
"You cannot shake hands with a clenched fist."
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Laurence J. Peter

Sat, 04/12/2014 - 7:00pm
"Competence, like truth, beauty and contact lenses, is in the eye of the beholder."
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Jerome K. Jerome

Sat, 04/12/2014 - 7:00pm
"It is always the best policy to speak the truth--unless, of course, you are an exceptionally good liar."
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Jules Renard

Fri, 04/11/2014 - 7:00pm
"Look for the ridiculous in everything and you will find it."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Howard Dietz

Fri, 04/11/2014 - 7:00pm
"I don't like composers who think. It gets in the way of their plagiarism."
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Rita Mae Brown

Fri, 04/11/2014 - 7:00pm
"I finally figured out the only reason to be alive is to enjoy it."
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John Cage

Fri, 04/11/2014 - 7:00pm
"I can't understand why people are frightened of new ideas. I'm frightened of the old ones."
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Woody Allen

Thu, 04/10/2014 - 7:00pm
"You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred."
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Sir Frederick G. Banting

Thu, 04/10/2014 - 7:00pm
"No one has ever had an idea in a dress suit."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Kurt Vonnegut

Thu, 04/10/2014 - 7:00pm
"Beware of the man who works hard to learn something, learns it, and finds himself no wiser than before... He is full of murderous resentment of people who are ignorant without having come by their ignorance the hard way."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Dan Quayle

Thu, 04/10/2014 - 7:00pm
"I believe we are on an irreversible trend toward more freedom and democracy - but that could change."
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Stanislaw J. Lec

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 7:00pm
"I am against using death as a punishment. I am also against using it as a reward."
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Jane Caminos

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 7:00pm
"A waist is a terrible thing to mind."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Abraham Lincoln

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 7:00pm
"He can compress the most words into the smallest ideas of any man I ever met."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Bertrand Russell

Wed, 04/09/2014 - 7:00pm
"Aristotle maintained that women have fewer teeth than men; although he was twice married, it never occurred to him to verify this statement by examining his wives' mouths."
Categories: Fun Stuff