Quotes of the Day

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Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Updated: 9 hours 8 min ago

Henri-Fr�d�ric Amiel

Tue, 05/17/2016 - 7:00pm
"Nothing is more characteristic of a man than the mann in which he behaves toward fools."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Ellen DeGeneres

Tue, 05/17/2016 - 7:00pm
"The good psychic would pick up the phone before it rang. Of course it is possible there was noone on the other line. Once she said "God Bless you" I said, "I didn't sneeze" She looked deep into my eyes and said, "You will, eventually." And damn it if she wasn't right. Two days later I sneezed."
Categories: Fun Stuff

Henny Youngman

Tue, 05/17/2016 - 7:00pm
"I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays."
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Will Rogers

Tue, 05/17/2016 - 7:00pm
"See what will happen if you don't stop biting your fingernails?"
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Bertrand Russell

Mon, 05/16/2016 - 7:00pm
"It has been said that man is a rational animal. All my life I have been searching for evidence which could support this."
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Andrew S. Tanenbaum

Mon, 05/16/2016 - 7:00pm
"The nice thing about standards is that there are so many of them to choose from."
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Stephen Leacock

Mon, 05/16/2016 - 7:00pm
"Advertising may be described as the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it."
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Jerome K. Jerome

Mon, 05/16/2016 - 7:00pm
"It is always the best policy to speak the truth--unless, of course, you are an exceptionally good liar."
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Moby

Sun, 05/15/2016 - 7:00pm
"I had an epiphany a few years ago where I was out at a celebrity party and it suddenly dawned on me that I had yet to meet a celebrity who is as smart and interesting as any of my friends."
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Robert Frost

Sun, 05/15/2016 - 7:00pm
"Most of the change we think we see in life is due to truths being in and out of favor."
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H. G. Wells

Sun, 05/15/2016 - 7:00pm
"Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe."
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William Blake

Sun, 05/15/2016 - 7:00pm
"It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend."
Categories: Fun Stuff