Quotes of the Day
Four humorous quotations each day from The Quotations Page
Updated: 3 min 27 sec ago
"Not only is the universe stranger than we imagine, it is stranger than we can imagine."
"It is the wretchedness of being rich that you have to live with rich people."
"By all means marry; if you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher."
"The end of the human race will be that it will eventually die of civilization."
"What can you say about a society that says that God is dead and Elvis is alive?"
"I get up every morning determined to both change the world and have one hell of a good time. Sometimes this makes planning my day difficult."
"Yesterday I was a dog. Today I'm a dog. Tomorrow I'll probably still be a dog. Sigh! There's so little hope for advancement."
"A government that robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul."
"Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing."
"A liberal is a person whose interests aren't at stake at the moment."
"What some people mistake for the high cost of living is really the cost of high living."
"A painting in a museum hears more ridiculous opinions than anything else in the world."
"It is of interest to note that while some dolphins are reported to have learned English -- up to fifty words used in correct context -- no human being has been reported to have learned dolphinese."